The Boss Who “Cares” aka The Hypocritical Bastard


ClassicStyleHypocrisyMeterHey you, hard-working people, regardless of your profession, stature, or rank! I am talking to all of you!  Beware of "NICE" BOSSES!

You know the type – he always smiles at you, tells you jokes (and laughs loudly himself), asks about your family (sometimes even during first interviews), says "thank you" at the end of the day, declares that he wants everyone who works for him to be happy, claims to keep your opinion in high regard.  

This is all BULLSHIT!!!  This boss is a liar and a hypocrite!  Don't think for a second that because he acts like that on the surface, he really cares and will do right by you in terms of things that really matter, i.e. create material (compensation, benefits, working space) and moral (respect, recognition) stimuli for you to work harder and feel satisfied with your own performance!  

In fact, this faux exterior should be taken as a first sign of a shitty character.  There is an old proverb that applies perfectly here: "He makes a very soft bed that will be hard to sleep in."  The only person such a boss cares about is himself!  At the end of the day, all that huggy, phony warmth is just for him and him alone.  And because people like that lie to themselves the same way they lie to others, he goes home honestly believing that he is a swell guy and a wonderful boss.  He simultaneously pats himself in the back and jerks himself off.

 But when it comes to serious, important staff…  This is the guy who will fight you tooth and nail for every penny of raise or bonus you want to give your direct subordinates at the end of the year.  It doesn't matter to him that you only want to reward those who applied themselves the hardest, grew, learned, developed, and that you keep it all within the budget.  He'd rather double his own withholdings (for being so wonderful!) than reinforce the merit.  In fact, he will say, "Didn't we pay for her plane tickets when she went to her grandmother's funeral?"  Yes, we did – you suggested it to  be "nice."  So, now you think that was in lieu of the annual performance bonus?

And this is the guy who will reply to every great proposal from the members of his executive team, writing the exclamation-point emails: "Thank you!" "Great idea!" "Brilliant!" But he will never green-light the actual implementations.  You will see the mean gleam in his eyes every time the life proves you right or someone on the outside of the business confirms that you understand it much better than he does.  If that happens, he will enter a crazy cycle, competing with you all the time, even though he is the boss and, therefore, already won by default. 

I believe that the best working environments are created not by cuddly fakeness, but by indiscriminate fairness, accommodation of professional growth, and respect of achievements (the principles I myself exercise).  If that's impossible to have, I prefer an honest brute instead of a "nice" hypocritical bastard.  In this economy (or, as I call it "new reality") only a few of us get lucky and find "better" jobs.  The rest must tolerate whatever hateful things they are forced to experience.  And that's Ok (there is no such a thing as a "perfect" job anyway), as long as you face the reality with the full understanding of the situation and don't get fooled by appearances. 

Quote of the Week: The Accounting Blues


Images-2The Frustrated CFO's Preface:

From time to time I feel a need to come back to the discussion of an emotional burden carried by the accountants who find themselves in the unfortunate position of recognizing and reporting business losses.  And I feel absolutely justified doing so, because it is one of the most painful professional experiences.  Moreover, it is a reality many small-business CFOs and Controllers have to face with a persistent regularity.  Less than three months ago, for example, I wrote about the effect of losses on bosses (upon closing of the second quarter by the companies with a calendar fiscal year).  Nobody ever mentions how hard it is for us to be the messengers of news that may translate into budget cuts, layoffs, credit line recalls, and possible termination of business.  So, I feel obligated to talk about it.

Imagine my surprise, when I discovered a depiction of the familiar sentiments in a Booker Prize winning novel about one woman's wasted life – Margaret Atwood's The Blind Assassin.  I don't know whether Ms. Atwood is acquainted with somebody who shared their experiences with her, or she is that good at getting inside her characters' heads and imagining how it would feel to someone in real life.  What matters is that it's very accurate.  So, here it is:

"Two and two made four…  But what if you didn't have two and two?  Then things wouldn't add up.  And they didn't add up, I couldn't get them to; I couldn't get the red numbers in the… books to turn black.  This worried me horribly: it was as if it were my own personal fault.  When I closed my eyes at night I could see the numbers on the page before me, laid out in rows on my square oak desk… – those rows of red numbers like so many mechanical caterpillars, munching away at what was left of the money.  When what you could manage to sell a thing for was less than what it paid you to make it… – this was how the numbers behaved.  It was bad behaviour – without love, without justice, without mercy – but what could you expect?  The numbers were only numbers.  They had no choice in the matter."

                                                             Anchor Books edition, 2000, p. 204

                                                                

Quote of the Week: Disappearance of Ambiguity Brings the Arthouse Down




“To be in the hands of an auteur like [Andrey Tarkovskiy],
that would be just brilliant. But I don’t know if those kind of films
can ever be made any more. To get art nowadays, in cinema or books or
anything, that grapples with the possibility of a meaningless universe… it just doesn’t happen any more. In even the most indie of the indie films, everything has to come to some kind of neat conclusion. But that’s part of the problem with politics and history and everything today, that people think there’s a right and a wrong, a good and a bad… maybe there just isn’t . . .”

                                                                                        Emily Mortimer