Quote of the Week: Mad World


Carl-jung-3"Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you."

                C.G. Jung

The Frustrated CFO's comment:

My mother, a doctor, always told me that one should be wary of psychiatrists, because they are just as crazy as their patients.  I don't know about all psychiatrists, but it's definitely applies to Jung.  I own his Red Book – going through it is a trip like no other.  Then again, I think today it would be virtually impossible to find a truly sane subject for Jung's reformation.  look around you – everyone runs in circles.  It's a mad world.

  

2013 Audit Season: Joke #1


Sleeping AuditorI already wrote about subsequent-events analysis during audits in my post Ignorantly Insolent Bosses.  Payments received from customers in January and February prove the validity of sales invoices outstanding as of 12/31.  On the other hand, if you made a payment to a vendor on 01/07/13 for an invoice dated 12/08/12, which wasn't included into your accounts payable schedule – that's an error: both the liability and the related expense should've been recognized in 2012.  There are subsequent events tests for all accounting cycles – really useful, powerful, mandatory for any audit.  If done thoroughly, they can uncover all those overstated revenues and hidden costs that result in public companies' going out of business and their executives going to jail.

"If" is an operative word.  Here is an actual story that happened during the week of 02/25/2013.  An audit field work was under way at ABC International, Inc.  A mid-size NYC CPA firm has been servicing this company for a few years, covering all corporate taxation needs as well as providing their independent opinion on the annual financial statements, which the company submits to their lenders, insurance underwriters, major suppliers, and other users.  ABC has a very strong CFO and the auditors never find anything out of order in the company's books, records, and statements. 

That's great, except that the audit quality should not be affected by the previous experience.  Yet, this time around the CFO noticed that the audit manager seemed a bit lax - the test selections were smaller, there were less questions and supporting documentation requests.  She was pleased: it shortened the exam time and also signified the auditors' confidence in her own work.  Of course, there is confidence and there is negligence. 

As soon as the audit started, the CFO asked her staff accountant to generate January and February schedules of sales, receipts, vouchers, and payments (the subsequent events), which were provided to the auditors with a copy to her.  When the CFO reviewed the information to make sure that everything was in order, she has realized that the payment journal was drawn for the beginning of 2012 instead of 2013 (people do have a tendency of clicking keys without thinking).

The CFO immediately generated correct schedules and was about to email them to the audit manager, when she stopped herself.  Why the hell didn't he notice it?  Did he even looked at it?  She decided not to do anything for the moment and see what would happen.

A couple of days later, the field work was completed.  Two weeks later the CPA firm prepared the draft of their independent opinion and the footnotes, which were sent to the CFO for review (she told me she's received it today).  Nobody ever mentioned the year old supporting data.  Nobody caught it: not the auditing staff, or the manager, or the firm's quality control department.  What quality?  Please, don't make me laugh!                

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CFO Folklore: Ignorantly Insolent Bosses

To Those Who Doubt My Objectivity: HBO “Girls,” Season 2, Episode 8


Ok, I honestly thought that my post about the foreign press conspiracy was the last thing I would ever write about Lena Dunham, HBO’s Girls, the unjustified and pervasive brouhaha surrounding them, etc.  But I was never joking when I said that merit and objectivity were placed very high on my hierarchy of values.  They are so important to me that I can even look at a pool of  shit, notice a few specks of goodness there, and effortlessly say, “This is a pool of shit, but those couple of things are quite good.” 

No, I didn’t change my mind about Dunham’s creations so far, especially the ones she’s done on her own, without any help from other writing and directing talents; nor did I recant my opinion about the hipsters of media who buzz her up to the sky.  But that doesn’t prevent me from objectively acknowledging that the 8th episode of the second season, It’s Back, was a remarkable breakthrough.

For the very first time, the show elevated itself to the level of truly generational significance.  Because, if anything unites people in their 20s across geographical borders, nationalities, social origins, monetary standings, physical appearances, intellectual abilities, and creative talents, it’s the unprecedented levels of anxiety, uncertainty, disorientation, and doubt (whether deeply hidden or worn right there on their faces) we have instilled in them.

Yes, WE, most of all the parents, but also teachers, employers, mentors, and public figures – we fucked them young bitches up with our twisted, contradictory, egomaniacal, and unfounded “guidance!”  We tell them to pursue their dreams, yet want them to be financially self-sufficient.  We tell them that they can achieve whatever they want if they try their best, while knowing very well that no amount of hard work and talent can compete with inroads based on personal connections.  We tell them that a higher education leads to better employment, while openly complaining about our own jobs.  We convince them that they are talented, unique, smart, and beautiful, yet cannot summon enough decency to show them the respect they actually deserve.

And so, here, in episode 8, we have a gallery of ALL the lead characters presented in nearly equal measure (already an outstanding feat for “Girls”), with their various manifestations of the generational malady:

Absent is Jessa, the eternal quitter, once again wandering away in search of the false thrills of a “real life” (beautifully written out in the previous episode into her already-showing pregnancy by the Six Feet Under alumnus Bruce Eric Kaplan).

The dashing, gifted, interesting, and earnest Adam, who theoretically should not have any qualms about getting a girl, admitting to his blind date (set up by the girl’s mother),  that he is so nervous, he’s “sweating bullets.”  And we just know that he will fuck it up eventually.

The heart-broken Charlie, who drops his guitar and channels his pain into creating an iPhone app inspired by the obsessive pain inside him.  Yes, he cashes in on it and, by “society’s standards,” he seems to be on the top of the world, but his sad eyes say otherwise.  Moreover, we know all about the longevity of these startups.

The awkward Shoshanna, torn between the die-hard concept that college is supposed to be “the best time of one’s life” (never mind all those NYU suicides) and the reality that she lives with an adult man whom she actually supports; scared that, whether successful or not, she will be just as lost as her friends after graduation.

The “adult” Ray himself, a self-proclaimed “homeless loser,”  who is smart and possibly talented (in something), but is trapped in the reality that he cannot find a way into the world, in which he believes he belongs.  Yet, he still feels that he has a right to give advice to his fellow struggler “to stop being a cartographer, and start being an explorer.”

Here is Marnie, standing in front of Ray, crushed by disillusion and failing to be “the most likely to succeed.”  Pushed to the edge, she admits that all she wants to do is to sing… and turns out she has a beautiful instrument for it too.  Who could possibly know?  She was hiding it from everyone.

And there is Hannah…  This is the first show on television that unflinchingly uncovered a true portrait of OCD, without providing any comically cutesy cushions for the audience – just a straight blow to the head in all its ugliness.  This is what it’s really like – exhausting and debilitating, leaving you feeling powerless, reduced to a fucking puppet. This is also the first time someone showed with an admirable subtlety what it does to a girl when her loving father tells her: “You can’t be anorexic – I’ve seen you in a bathing suit.”

Considering the track record up to this point, it’s hard to believe that all of it was fitted into one episode.  It was written by three people – Lena Dunham herself, Steven Rubinshteyn (who served as Ms. Dunham’s assistant for the two seasons), and Deborah Schoeneman (who worked as the story editor on the show).  The rich material gave Jesse Peretz an opportunity to use his directorial skills for real. 

And they did all this without any cheap tricks: no false dramatics, no incoherent story turns, no random bare breasts and asses.  Instead, the episode was finally able to achieve a high degree of emotional nakedness.                   

Is this the beginning of a transformation?  I hope so.  Episode 9, On All Fours, (written by Dunham and Jenni Konner, directed by Dunham) is definitely an excellent follow up.  I always said, that Lena Dunham is a capable person, who will get better as she learns from other talented people.  But, on her own, she has a long way to go before she can truly live up to the hype around her.  Will she learn humility and start giving credits where they are due?  Who knows? 

Interestingly enough, as reported by The Atlantic Wire on March 7th, the co-authors of the It’s Back episode are not invited into the third season’s writers’ room.  Moreover, everyone in that room has been fired.  Only a few older pros will be allowed to share credits with Ms. Dunnam in the third season: Apatow, Konner, Kaplan, Heyward.  Maybe it will help Lena to hold on to her “so young, so brilliant” status longer?  These people will always be older than her.  You know who else is pegged to participate?  Dunham’s parents.  Reverse nepotism?  Oh, well…  

Quote of the Week: Some Business Advices are Truly Priceless


Images"If you want to make it in show business, get the hell out of Oregon."

                    Advice from Sophie Tucker (a Russian-born American singer, comedian, actress, and radio personality, 1884-1966) to a young Johnnie Ray

The Frustrated CFO's comment:  Thank God, he paid attention to her.

 

MONEYNEWS: The Shit Will Hit the Fan Soon – Didn’t I Say So?


For a really long time now, I've been explaining (and so have other realists) that the overpricing of pretty pieces of paper (aka stocks, bonds, treasury bills, etc.) caused by the gambling games of cocaine-fueled, high-strung nitwits in high-rise brokerage offices and delusional day-traders glued to their hand-held devices has nothing to do with real production values, revenue growth, profit generation, and economy improvements.  

It's shocking to me that people seriously accept the stock market "rally" of the past few months as a sign of tangible fiscal gains. The same goes for the rise in housing prices resulted from the unprecedentedly low mortgage rates artificially kept down by the US Treasury.

Don't you people understand that, just like with a terminal patient, this is a temporary remission before the downfall?  You cannot take a candy wrapper that worth 1 cent and say that its price is $430 just because there is a schmuck who is willing to shell out that kind of money for it and hope that there is another idiot out there who will pay $450.  Any, more or less logical, person should understand that the real value behind the candy wrapper is still 1 cent, regardless of how much money you pay for it.  But apparently the general public is severely lacking common sense and logical aptitude.

You know what else they are lacking? The disposal income – the money to spend, the moolah to throw around, the dollars to buy the products of the very companies, whose stocks comprise these people's pension and college funds.  If the consumer market contracts, how can companies generate revenues?  How can a nation experience a recovery, when 99.9% of it is getting poorer and poorer by the minute?

This issue of the constant reduction of consumer spending is at the core of the economic disasters ahead of us.  And apparently the public-stock billionaires, whose wealth is so easily added up and compiled into lists in the Forbes's offices, have already caught up with the reality - they are in high-gear disposal mode.

Please-please read this MONEYNEWS' article about Billionaires Dumping Stocks.  In addition to listing the relevant verifiable facts, it also refers readers to the voice of reason – an economist with an impeccable prediction record who foresees a market adjustment as dramatic as 90%!!!  And if you want a really full picture read the other articles linked below as well.   

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Billionaires dumping stocks like they're going out of style (including bank stocks).